Who’s bloody idea was it to leave our gargantuan Xmas tree up till now because it seemed a shame to take it down?

Oh. Mine.

Have just spent the best part part of two hours trimming it down with secateurs (causing each branch to immediately jettison all its needles), manhandling it out of the door and down the garden in the dark and then clearing up the mountain of needles left behind on the carpet. 
This part of the operation necessitated multiple unblockings of the Dyson which consisted of dismantling, disembowelling, Dynorodding and what can only be described as colonic irrigation of the bastarding machine to get the repeated log jams of needles from the varying combinations of tubes, orifices and brushes. I used attachments I had no idea I possessed and discovered fascinating (and frankly lethal to one’s extremities) internal workings (Must remember to unplug it before sticking my fingers in it..)
Our hall has now been reclaimed, the dogs have emerged from their hiding places and the Dyson finally reassembled for the nth time.
I have needles in my hair, up my nose, in my ears, in my socks and inexplicably, in my pants.