Lagertha the Lawn Queen (well, you have to name the bloomin’ thing to use the App) is back up and running. I’m pretty smitten and, frankly, obsessed. She has been cutting the grass in the dark with her headlights on which makes me, stupidly, very happy. I have had to turn them off, however, as the Springer spaniel turns into a frantically barking, demented, hairy blur whenever she approaches the kitchen doors.