When we go on holiday this year, a bachelor friend of advanced years who lives a simple life, alone, with no animals will be house/hen/dog sitting for 10 days. I sat down today and wrote out what I do every morning before I go to work and when I get back in the evening to keep the house/garden/greenhouse/dogs/hens running smoothly/in order/fed/alive so that when we return all will be good with the world.

I then showed the sheet of helpful hints to himself to see if I had missed anything out.

“What’s all this crap? He’ll never read this! I’m sure he knows how to feed dogs and hens! It’s easy”

Oh, yes of course.

The magic, tactical, multiple, inane and routine job fairy which is present in every household won’t be going with us?

Hmmmm.